Sunday, September 30, 2007

Metamorphosis

Earlier this week, the people I work for were nice enough to send me on an almost all expenses paid trip to the desert of northeastern California. My assignment was to perform an investigation of a building in which the roof beams had cracked. Now I know that looking at cracks is not that interesting for most of you, but for guys like me it doesn’t get much better. Fortunately for all of us, there aren’t that many guys like me….

I flew into the Rogue Valley International Airport in Medford, Oregon, and boy were my arms tired… (Sorry I couldn’t resist….)

Rogue Valley International

Medford sits in the Rogue Valley, which was apparently named after bloggers with marginal talent. Well, either that or the Rogue River.

The Rogue River valley was originally inhabited by Native Americans who lived along the banks of the river. The river got its name because of this, and was known as “The River of the Rogues.”

Rogue River

On the flight to Medford our plane flew a little to the west and a few thousand feet above Mt. Shasta. The mountain was on my side of the plane and we were treated to a spectacular view of this snow-capped peak. Geologically speaking, Mt. Shasta is classified as a “Big Damn Mountain,” and rises approximately 10, 000 feet above the surrounding valley floor and topping out at 14,179 feet.

Mt. Shasta

On Saturday, Mrs. R and I went to the CU-Oklahoma game in Boulder. Before the game we went to the bookstore and loaded up on some gear, then headed over to the field surrounding the Benson Earth Sciences building where the Alumni Association sets up a big ol’ tent, has some live music, and serves some good food. We were treated to a performance by the Golden Buffalo Marching Band, and then all of us got up and followed the band into the stadium.

The field around the Benson Earth Sciences building was previously known as Brackett Field, and was used primarily as a site for intramural sports such as flag football and coed softball. As a student in the fall of 1979, I was asked by some junior high buddies of mine to join their flag football team. Being all too aware of our athletic ability, we signed up for the B-League tier, which was the lowest classification possible.

I played tight end on offense, and defensive end on defense. My role in the offense was to stand at the end of line and, “if nobody else is open, maybe we’ll throw it to you.”

On defense, I was to stand at the end of the line and “if somebody runs near you carrying the ball, grab their flag.”

B-League Intramural Flag Football offenses and defenses were very sophisticated in those days….

A few days before our first “practice” I read in the school paper that the Boulder Gay Liberation (BGL) was going to field two intramural teams in the fall semester, women’s volleyball and men’s flag football. I thought to myself “that’s cool; they should be involved in all of the campus activities.”

I went to our first practice; eager to show the guys how good I was at standing at the end of the line. I saw our captain, shook his hand and said “so, who is first game against”? The poor guy turned ashen, beads of sweat formed on his forehead, and in a quivering voice he said “dude, we’ve got to win…”

It took me a few seconds, but then I got it. Our first game was going to be against the BGL. Now, intramurals was supposed to be a fun, low-stress, no-pressure way to get some exercise. But our team quickly realized that the all of the heterosexual men on campus would be counting on us. So much for fun, low-stress, no-pressure exercise…

At this time, the future Mrs. R and I had been dating for about a month or so. My father-in-law-to-be conveyed a message to me, through her, that said, “If you wish to continue seeing my daughter and to be welcome in my home, you better win the damn game!” So much for fun, low-stress, no-pressure exercise…

Game day was suddenly upon us, it was one of those glorious Colorado fall afternoons, with warm temperatures and clear blue skies. My roommate, who was also a teammate, and I left our dorm and made our way to Brackett Field. As we approached the field, we noticed quite a bit of folks surrounding the west end of the field, where our game was to take place.

Those folks included news trucks from a couple of the Denver news stations, and an all-male cheerleading squad wearing lavender shirts and white knit pants. They called themselves the “Lavender Express,” a not-to-subtle reference to the Denver Broncos Pony Express cheerleaders.

There were dozens of spectators surrounding the field, which was unusual for intramural sports. Most of the time, spectators included only the girlfriends of the two guys on the team that actually had girlfriends.

Late adolescence can be a difficult time for men, (actually anytime can be a difficult time for men, but I’ll save that for another blog) and so the unwritten code of flag football was that you used the shotgun formation for all offensive plays, be they run or pass. This was primarily done in case a couple of gorgeous coeds were to wander near the field as you were taking a snap… So our team used the shotgun, however, the BGL quarterback took the more conventional approach, and ahem, got right up under the center…

Anyway, once the game started, you forgot about all of the extra-curricular nonsense going on around the field, and played and had fun. The BGL was a good bunch of guys and they played just as hard as we did. We treated each other with respect, both sides had a lot laughs, and no one was injured. After the game, we shook hands and wished each other good luck for the rest of the season.

The final score of that game is lost to history, but let’s just say that I was allowed to continue seeing the future Mrs. R. Some video clips from the game were shown on the evening news, much to the delight of my future father-in-law, and our team went on the win the B-League Intramural Flag Football championship that year.

Last Saturday, the real football players played. Oklahoma was ranked No. 3 coming into the game and listed as a 22 point favorite. We sat up high again, and had a beautiful view of the Flatirons to the south and the mountains to the west. At the start of the game our seats were shaded by the club level seats behind us. Also, we were surrounded on three sides by OU fans.

The guy sitting next to Mrs. R., and clad in OU regalia from head to toe, asked “will it get warm when ‘at sun comes ‘round the stadium?” What I wanted to say was, “Yes, it’s the same sun you have in Oklahoma, and it makes things warm. It’s of the reasons there’s life on this planet, and because of that we get to spend our leisure time enjoying college football.” Instead, I just said “yes” and was met with a skeptical look from Mr. OU.

During timeouts scores from other games are often shown on the scoreboard. At one point the score of the Kentucky- Florida Atlantic game was flashed, and it showed Kentucky to be ahead.

I heard these sounds from Mr. OU No.2 sitting behind us.

“YepKintuckayzzzzzzzpurdygoodnissyeer.”

I had to consult with several linguistics experts, and as best as can be determined, what was actually being said was:

“Yes. The University of Kentucky has a fine football team this season.”

The Buff defense played very well once again, but the offense was having some trouble. The Sooners led 17-7 at the half. I told Mrs. R that the score was closer than I thought would be.

With 2-1/2 minutes gone in the third quarter, Oklahoma scored again, making it 24-7. I told Mrs. R. that is was over, the roof was going to cave on the Buffs, that I’d seen this happen more times than I care to remember. I was quickly chastised as being “Oh ye of little faith. Come on dude, it’s your team, don’t give up.”

She was right of course. Midway though the third quarter, CU kicked a field to make it 24-10, and that’s how the third quarter ended.

Then two amazing things happened. Mrs. R began to transform into a CU football fan before my very eyes. She was, yelling and screaming, and she even sung a couple of bars of the fight song. I started tearing up, and not because the Buffs were making a comeback.


Down on the field, the Buffs suddenly found their running game, and began to move the ball with some authority. With about four minutes left, the Buffs tied it up at 24.

The stadium was rocking. There was cheering, yelling, screaming, and big smiles on all of the Buffs fans.

Oklahoma got the ball back and went three and out. CU returned the ensuing punt to midfield, then calmly drove down to the Sooner 28 yard line and kicked the winning field goal as time expired!

Mrs. R and I screamed, high-fived each other and every CU fan we could reach, the students stormed the field, and it was the greatest afternoon ever at Folsom Field.


And one more thing very important thing folks. One of our readers is having some health issues right now, and will be having surgery week after next. Keep a good thought or two for her…

Monday, September 17, 2007

Buffaloed

Daughter Rogue and I went to the CU vs. Florida State Seminoles game Saturday night. I’m the "skinny" guy in black….

DR was mortified when I asked her to take this picture. She told everyone who walked by “He’s not my Dad!” And “I don’t even know who this guy is. He just asked me to take his picture. What a dork.”

The fun started a couple of hours earlier when DR came over before the game and remarked about my new CU (it’s not yellow, its gold) flag which I now proudly fly every game day, “Nice flag Dad. You’re a major nerd.” Ouch…

I was, however, glad to be upgraded from nerd to dork the closer we got to kickoff.

As we entered the stadium, I overheard a lot of people asking “Dude, what’s a Seminole?” I’m always so proud when the students of my alma mater display their depth of knowledge and an awareness of other cultures…

The Seminoles are Native Americans originally from Florida, with groups now living in both Florida and Oklahoma. They have the distinction of being the only Indian tribe that has never signed a peace treaty with the United States, and are known as the “Unconquered People.”

http://www.seminoletribe.com/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seminole

We entered the stadium and made our way to our seats near the top of the stadium. DR was very proud of me because I only need to stop twice for oxygen on the climb. I was proud of me too, until I got passed by a 68 year-old grandmother who was heading toward the top row two steps at a time, and not even breathing hard…

DR’s favorite part of a CU game is the “Ralphie Wranglers.” These are the brave young men and women who lead Ralphie onto the field before kickoff at the start of the game and after halftime. It is one of the greatest moments in college football, and not because the wrangler guys are “hot.” Not that I think they are hot, because I have no strong feelings either way, but DR seems to think that the wranglers alone are worth the ticket price.

Oh by the way, Ralphie was recently named the best mascot in college football…

Ralphie is No. 1

When FSU scores, their cheerleaders run through the end zone waving flags that spell N-O-L-E-S. DR suggested that since most people don’t know what a ‘Nole is, they should spell S-E-M-I-S instead… It’s also a good description for some of their offensive linemen.

During the first quarter we got to listen to the saga of Craig and Debbie from the people sitting behind us. It seems that C+D and met at a tailgate before the game and had agreed to meet in the stadium. The conversation went something like this:

“Go find her Craig!” said Debbie’s friend, who we’ll call Susan.

“Where is she?” Craig asked.

“She’s in row 76.” Susan replied.

“Which section?” an exasperated Craig asked.

“Our section. God Craig, you are so lame” Susan said.

You probably remember similar conversations from your high school days. The fact that Susan, Craig and Debbie are all 30-somethings is unfortunate, but pretty damn funny…

Anyway, we got to watch Craig spend most of the first quarter pacing up and down the jam-packed rows of Section 215 searching in vain for Debbie. Craig even called Susan, who was all of four rows from where he was standing, to help him home in on Debbie. Why no one thought to actually call Debbie is unclear…

Later in the game, while the rest of Section 215 was distracted by the action on the field, Susan exclaimed “Oh look, they’re sitting together! Are they holding hands? I think they’re holding hands! Oh my God!”

The CU defense was terrific, giving up only 16 points to the Seminoles, despite having to defend a short field on a couple of occasions. The Buff defense played with heart and abandon, only gave up two big plays, and never quit.

The offense played well between the 30 yard lines but seemed to self-destruct in the red zone. The Buffs do not have much of a running game this year, and finished the night with negative 27 yards rushing.

Generally the FSU fans were classy and respectful. There was, however one notable exception. On a drive in the 4th quarter, as CU was moving the ball with some ease, an FSU fan sitting a couple rows behind us kept yelling at FSU defensive coordinator Mickey Andrews to “Rush 4 Mickey! Come on! You’re so f**king stupid!” FSU was playing a prevent defense and rushing only 3 down linemen. The tactic worked quite well since the drive ended without the Buffs scoring.

I didn’t realize Coach Andrews was such a moron, because when I looked at the scoreboard it said Florida State 16, Colorado 0. I did some high level math (you know, carry the 2, divide by 1) and figured out that for a defense the best you can do is hold the other team to zero points.

I ‘m always amazed at how many coaches are in the stands instead of down on the sidelines on game day…

CU didn’t score until there was 3:38 remaining in the fourth quarter.

Final score: Florida State 16, Colorado 6.


So the score wasn't what I hoped for, but the company couldn't have been better...